Last you heard from me I was cracking out on sunshine and recovering from a stress-induced lizard-woman disease. (I know, I know, I am so attractive sometimes.) But you know. Just trying to keep you up to speed here. Trying to keep it real.
The SUN! Oh god, the SUN!! It was so beautiful and so fleeting! And then the rain came back! And then the rain left again and then the sun came back! And now we are BACK with a second round of Portland Summer Fake-Out!! BOOM!!
As if my last post wasn’t enough of an indicator for you, I kind of lose my shit when the sun comes out. And all of the baaaack and forrrrrth with this hot love affair between PDX and the sun has really been toying with my HEART. It has been getting more and more difficult for me to stay focused at my day job when the sun is blaring through the windows and skylights (and thank goodness for those, let me tell you, I’ll take vitamin D where I can get it). My restlessness has become overwhelming and my ability to sit still for more than ten minutes is now a thing of the past. I find that I have been taking far too many walks during my work day for it to be considered acceptable.
Ohhhhh the many distracting qualities of clear blue skies…
Staying cooped-up during the daylight hours (and being expected to sit down and stay still for so long) is difficult for me. And it’s not just during the sunny days. It’s pretty much all the time. I’m discovering that being an office-monkey is becoming more and more unrealistic for me…
My girl Dani once kept a blog devoted entirely to the topic of Office Monkey-ing and office humor from the perspective of an artist trapped in a corporate environment.
Okay… perhaps “trapped” is a strong word… Or, maybe not, actually. But you know what I’m talking about, right? For a creative or an especially social person, or for someone who needs to work with their hands or on their feet to be productive, cubicle life can be damaging. I know at least for me, it zaps my energy in a very odd way. The whole right brain/left brain switch often leaves me feeling off-center and scattered if sustained for too long. And don’t get me wrong… I am SO thankful for my job and its flexibility with my schedule and the comfort of a regular paycheck, but… I have to at least be honest with myself and acknowledge what truly drains me. Is this schizo-lifestyle sustainable? Who knows.
But get this. Cubicle life can zap my energy, sure… but it also makes me act out in odd ways as if to creatively compensate for all that I am repressing for 9 hours a day…
Once upon a time, when I was fresh out of college, I worked at a prestigious public accounting firm called Deloitte & Touche. Yes folks, I am also an accountant. It is still, in fact, what I do for my day job now. It’s hard to believe… I know. But just go with me on this one. Anyway. While I worked at Deloitte and had no time for creative outlets in any capacity, I may have gotten a little too cray in the workplace.
One of the clients I had as a first year auditor made this fucking rad commercial:
And this one:
Let’s just say I was obsessed with the absurdity and amazing-ness of their advertising. Once I discovered these commercials on the ‘ol youtube-s, I simply could not let it go to save my life. I could barely focus on the work that I was there to do. What was to come of this? Let’s just say that it is true that a picture is worth a thousand words, because….
This is me, circa 2009, as an employee of Deloitte:
Now. How I got a hold of this costume is not important. What is important is that I did this on a dare and put my whole auditing team to shame with my epic awesomeness. And let’s just say that the Managing Partner of Deloitte may have seen this photo… and for a hot minute I thought I was going to get fired over the thing (as I suppose this wasn’t the most professional attire to audit in while at the client’s corporate headquarters), but… instead it went down in Uncle D history. This moment captured on film was the very peak of my auditing career and I am proud.
I also asked the CFO of Yamasa if I could be in their next commercial. “I want to be a Yamasa girl,” I told him. He said he’d think about it.
Four years later, I am still waiting for that phone call… sigh. One day, folks. One day.
Ah, cubicles. You make loco.
I don’t even remember what I am talking about anymore. Mostly because I have been sitting at this very desk for too long already. Perhaps I have nothing else to say about cubicles and their side-effects.
Okay, so… what the hell have I been up to outside of the cubicle this week? Well, there’s been some stuff…
And now…. dun dun DUNNN… we are in full-on tech/dress mode to be in gear to open this Friday. It is ON, people!! This means we finally got to move into our theatre (after rehearsing in our small ghetto rehearsal room for a couple of weeks and then a week of rehearsal time in the lovely Oregon Children’s Theatre space):
And then TECHPOCALYPSE finally began. During which time our director went to the ER for 6 hours. Don’t worry, she’s fine. Just passing a kidney stone, no big deal. But we got this. We’re working our shit out. Just another Vertigo tech.
And as if komodo dragons, mummys, babies, hot ladies, men turning into lizards, portals and Santa Claus weren’t keeping me busy enough (when you see the show, you’ll get it), I made another whirl-wind trip to Seattle on Friday for a film audition at 1pm,
…only to zip back to PDX by 5pm for a commercial audition (which I booked!! Yay! Good thing I didn’t end up canceling that one…). But it was so beautiful and sunshine-y the whole drive and I was heavily caffeinated, so it was awesome. I blasted Ke$ha* (go ahead, judge me, I don’t give a shit) and ran lines with myself the whole time. It was a million times better than being stuck in my cubicle all day, where I run lines/sing Kes$ha in my head. Like a crazy person.
*I’m sorry, but how could you now love her?!
So anyway. Speaking of Ke$ha. Next time you hear from me I will be in Los Angeles with my most amazing Dani. Okay so maybe that has nothing to do with Ke$ha but the thought of knowing where I’ll be in a week makes me just as excited as:
See, that glittery ho gets me. I love you Ke$ha.
I think Ke$ha might be my spirit animal. I’d like to see someone try to put her in a cubicle. Mehtinks it wouldn’t end well.
stay crazy with me betches,